Motley Moose – Archive

Interrogatories

How far from where you grew up have you ended up? If you still live nearby, did you ever live far away?

Have you ever littered? Have you ever picked up after litterers?

Have you ever gotten revenge on anyone? Can you tell us about it?

The Twitter Emitter

If weed was a gateway drug, crack would be more popular than Starbucks.

— Jamilah Lemieux (@JamilahLemieux) March 3, 2014

BREAKING: Apple forced to deny rumors that Siri is pregnant

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) March 3, 2014

Republicans can't decide. Is Russia our biggest foe or is Putin the dreamiest?

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) March 3, 2014

Putin hates gays and loves foreign interventionism. He should be speaking at CPAC.

— Hunter (@HunterDK) March 3, 2014

imagine if Obama had previously announced he'd looked into Putin's soul and seen goodness? i think Fox would've collapse into itself by now

— Eric Boehlert (@EricBoehlert) March 4, 2014

gop has alpha male issues. "talk tough" is all they demand, don't use your brain because god forbid.

— Oliver Willis (@owillis) March 4, 2014

You know what makes America look weak? Cowardly Republican asshats sniping at the President during foreign policy crises.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) March 4, 2014

Review: Osama dead. Diplomacy used as a successful tool repeatedly. The drumbeat for war from #GOP after 48 hours because? #tcot

— Erin Kotecki Vest (@QueenofSpain) March 4, 2014

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

Greetings, Bombpersons. The Daily F Bomb is going on hiatus for an indefinite period. This Friday’s will be the last one for a while. I just need some time to be able to do things for myself. I have a full DVR that I need to take care of, and several books waiting for my attention that I haven’t been able to get to, and Lilly the cat says I am neglecting her shamefully because there is always a damned MacBook on her lap. And I need to get out and see my real life friends more often. It’s been fun, and hopefully will continue to be fun in the future.

Interrogatories

What sitcom (or funny film), best represents your sense of humor?

Have you Google-mapped your own place? How does it look?

What can always be counted on to cheer you up?

The Twitter Emitter

If the President ordered an invasion, the Republicans would suddenly be against it. See how easy it is to be a pundit?

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) March 2, 2014

If you casually move from writing Ronald Reagan fan fiction to Vladimir Putin fan fiction, you probably just like actors who ride horses.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) March 2, 2014

We can't afford to pay benefits promised to current veterans, say Republicans advocating new wars with Russia and Iran

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) March 2, 2014

Hi, I'm a guy who supported the Iraq war & is outraged Putin would invade a smaller country that hasn't attacked him.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) March 2, 2014

Everyone knows fact about Crimea I pulled from the first non-Wikipedia link on Google

— Jesse Taylor (@jesseltaylor) March 2, 2014

Shorter idiots: "Let's send your kids to a place I can't point out on a map because Mrka."

— Andrew Gatto (@AndrewGatto) March 2, 2014

We should have taught Putin an abstinence-only international relations curriculum.

— David Waldman (@KagroX) March 2, 2014

I think you should see other gods.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) March 2, 2014

Working on my Ukraine White Paper. So far I just have a white piece of paper with "Ukraine" written at the top.

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) March 2, 2014

"We must all rally behind our President at a time of international crisis. Ha ha. Just kidding," says Lindsey Graham

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) March 2, 2014

We don't even allow our elected officials to speak truth. If a politician speaks the reality of America they are demonized as unpatriotic.

— Elon James White (@elonjames) March 2, 2014

Maybe the Tea Partiers should all pick up their muskets and run off to fight Putin in the Ukraine.

— kara vallow (@teenagesleuth) March 2, 2014

  Good morning Motley Meese! Hope your weekend was lovely. This is how it is starting too look at my house, where the universe has apparently failed to notice that it’s March already now cut it out!!  ::takes deep cleansing breath::

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

Interrogatories

If you could devise a Rare Disease for Rare Disease Day that would affect only political figures on the right-wing persuasion, what disease would you give them? (Like foot-in-mouth-itis)

What book signings have you been to?

What is the last thing you rented?

The Twitter Emitter

A machine learning researcher, a crypto-currency expert, and an Erlang programmer walk into a bar. Facebook buys the bar for $27 billion.

— ML Hipster (@ML_Hipster) February 25, 2014

In lieu of Bitcoin, I’ve stuck to flushing $100 bills down a toilet. I’m deep in the red but at least I understand exactly what’s going on.

— John Gruber (@gruber) February 26, 2014

Millions of churches you can go to? Check. Thousands of Christian radio stations and TV shows? Check. STFU about being oppressed.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) February 27, 2014

OBAMACARE DAY 58: Texas gay marries Kentucky, all Christian residents forced to prepare floral arrangements; Subway offers marijuana salads

— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) February 27, 2014

First Obama empowers impoverished young black men, next white people are forced to work in BitCoin mines. That's how it works sheeple!

— Lex (@LuthorCEO) February 27, 2014

Hell is an airport where everyone has a laptop and there's only one socket.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) February 27, 2014

Human beings are the only creatures on earth with the potential to make themselves the only creatures on earth.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) February 28, 2014

Just let me know how exactly I should live my life so you have your "religious freedom." http://t.co/BQGrDc0SQb

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) February 28, 2014

And, even with ten years of gay marriage, Massachusetts has the lowest divorce rate in the United States. #protectingmarriage

— Will McAvoy (@WillMcAvoyACN) February 28, 2014

If gays have rights and can get married, then all you ladies will miss out on forcing them into loveless marriages. Call your Congressman!

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) February 28, 2014

Good morning, Moosekind. TGIF!

Interrogatories

What is the first thing you see right now when you look up from your computer?

Do you have any vices you refuse to give up? If so, what?

When was the last time you willingly stayed up all night?

If someone refused to take your wedding pictures because he/she hated something about you and your lifestyle, would you force the issue?

The Twitter Emitter

And then the cowards claimed that their religious freedom was being denied. Their freedom to deny my freedom!

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) February 27, 2014

Log Cabin Replicants

— Wile E. Quixote (@ScottLinnen) February 27, 2014

Dick Cheney: “Obama is reducing troop levels, when everyone knows you can save money by cutting armor for troops fighting a war in Iraq.”

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) February 27, 2014

The wages are too damn low.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) February 27, 2014

Arizona Gov Jan Brewer vetoes the "If I can't be an anti-gay bigot then you're an anti-Christian bigot" bill.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) February 27, 2014

Fox News reports that Rick Santorum has issued a fatwa on the federal judge who ruled the Texas gay marriage ban unconstitutional.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) February 27, 2014

The only religious freedom that maters is the one that frees me from your religion.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) February 27, 2014

The correlation between bigots and poor grammar is absolutely astonishing.

— Calvin (@aurosan) February 27, 2014

Remember that time Jesus refused to heal someone because he didn't support their lifestyle? Me neither.

— Susie Meister (@susie_meister) February 26, 2014

Cons: Replace these activist judges with OUR activist judges.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) February 26, 2014

If we renamed immigrants "fetuses" would the GOP would start treating them as human beings?

— kara vallow (@teenagesleuth) February 26, 2014

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!