In other words, North Korea’s Kim Jong-il has died. Dead. Bought farm, bit dust, cashed in, shuffled coil, croaked, given up the ghost, dirt nap, big sleep, teats up, sleeping with fishes, joined the choir invisible, pushing daisies, belly up, departed, boarded death’s little black train, danced last dance, worm food dead.
…and the world just got a little bit better for it. Is the heir equally as squirrel-turd nutty as Dear Leader? I guess we’ll find out soon enough. Jump the flip for some lulz trivia about Kim Jong-il. Otherwise, it’s an OPEN THREAD, so knock yourself out.
Did you know?
North Korean schools teach children that Jong-il’s birth was “supernatural.” He was born in a log cabin inside a secret base on the sacred Mt. Paekdu, the story goes, and his arrival was accompanied by the apparition of a new star. The seasons then spontaneously changed from winter to spring, and a double-rainbow appeared, followed by a talking iceberg.
Jong-il long claimed to be the world’s greatest golfer. In 1994, Pyongyang media reported that he shot 38 under par on a regulation 18-hole golf course, including 5 holes in one.
Kijong-Dong is a city built in the 1950s by Kim’s father, set on the border as an example to South Korea of their superiority. No one lives there, but every effort was made to make it function like an actual city. The buildings have no glass in the windows and no rooms: They are just concrete shells. It’s also home to the world’s largest flagpole.
State textbooks claim Jong-il does not produce urine or feces.