Motley Moose – Archive

Interrogatories

Have you ever been to the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade? How about the Hollywood one? The Rose Parade? Any parades?

Did your family follow politics when you were growing up? Do you remember watching the conventions and debates with them as a child? What was that like?

Do you prefer things to be scented or unscented?

How worried are you about the Supreme Court’s ultimate decision over this religious exemption?

The Twitter Emitter

#ThanksgivingTips Be sure to yell when arguing about Obama with young, liberal relatives. First one to raise their voice wins the argument!

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 26, 2013

Walmart could pay its employees a living wage if it would stop trying to make some of the richest Americans richer. http://t.co/esn92X6mnj

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 26, 2013

Obama's approval ratings fell again on news that he's trying to make healthcare affordable for all and prevent nuclear war.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 26, 2013

Must be hard to be a neocon at #Christmas. Having to cross PEACE off every card and scrawling WAR instead #WarOnChristmas

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 26, 2013

Sobering to know in a few days you'll be sitting at the dinner table with family members who don't care if you die from lack of healthcare.

— eclecticbrotha (@eclecticbrotha) November 26, 2013

I don't care what the Supreme Court says, corporations should have the right to a religion when they also get the right to go to jail.

— glenn o'brien (@lordrochester) November 26, 2013

There is no war on Christmas, dammit, but the war on Thanxgiving is REAL. The impoverished in America have nothing to be thankful for.

— David (@ahzoov) November 26, 2013

Ted Cruz believes that life begins when your boss says it begins. http://t.co/pWeyNOYufc

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 26, 2013

Religious exemptions are the road back to feudalism.

— Brent S. Sirota (@BrentSirota) November 26, 2013

If the Supreme Court allows religion in the workplace first thing I'm doing start a religion where work is prohibited on Monday mornings…

— Political Line (@PoliticaILine) November 26, 2013

Interrogatories

Did you ever belong to a fraternity or sorority? If so, which one?

How do you prepare your Thanksgiving turkey (or tofurkey, or other alternative)?

Have you ever vacationed in an RV? Would you ever?

What are some of your favorite family expressions, exclamations, etc. that are rarely heard anywhere these days?

The Twitter Emitter

Q: How many leftists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I'm really not sure lightbulb-installation should be our main priority.

— Benjamin Kunkel (@das_kunk) November 25, 2013

You may soon be able to use your cell on a plane. Which means I may soon be stuffing it into your lower intestine.

— Denis Leary (@denisleary) November 25, 2013

Hi, I'm offended at Martin Bashir's offensive comments about Sarah Palin's much much more offensive slavery comment which didn't offend me.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 25, 2013

Syeve Doocy thinks it's "curious timing" that Thanksgiving is coming just after the Iran deal so people will be encourage to feel thankful.

— Suzanne Munshower (@expatina) November 25, 2013

REMEMBER: We should let the people who want war set our foreign policy and those who don't care about the insured decide on health care.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 25, 2013

Maybe the people pushing for war with Iran are actually trying to distract us from the fact they just cut food aid to 48 million people

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 25, 2013

PREVIEW: Ted Cruz's alternative plan specifies that those who want health insurance should marry a banker with a good plan like he did.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 25, 2013

If I were president, I'd want John Bolton to be my advisor. Just do the opposite of what he says, and you can't go wrong.

— Frank Vdl (@fvdlfvdl) November 25, 2013

Powerful Winter Storm Providing Plausible Excuse Material

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) November 26, 2013

Interrogatories

What are you blasé about that still excites other people?

What big news event was the first you remember (like the Kennedy assassination was for many) and what do you remember about it?

Every century has a “trial of the century” and/or “Crime of the century” alongside the “storm of the century.” What trial, crime, and storm represents the last century for you?

Do you know, or did your family know, anyone who was blacklisted during the communist witch hunts of the 1950s?

The Twitter Emitter

Fundamentalist Christianity means believing Jesus wants us to help the poor by voting against ever ever helping the poor.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 21, 2013

George W. Bush: "I did the best I could do. It's hard to worry about all that stuff and still get 130 vacation days in each year."

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 21, 2013

There is no way 2 make fertilized eggs, embryos, and fetuses "full people w/constitutional rights" and not eliminated personhood of women.

— Jodi Jacobson (@jljacobson) November 21, 2013

An asteroid didn't kill the dinosaurs. Changing judicial confirmation procedures did.

— Hunter (@HunterDK) November 21, 2013

Pretty sure Pearl Harbor, 9/11, and Vietnam are still available as completely inappropriate ACA analogies

— Jeremy Holden (@JerAHolden) November 23, 2013

Interrogatories

Where do you stand on the Kennedy assassination? Do you believe Oswald acted alone, or do you subscribe to one of the other theories floating around out there?

It’s Start Your Own Country Day again. What kind of topography would your country have? What kind of climate? What kind of government?

On Go For a Ride Day, describe your ultimate ride? Is it a plane, a train, an automobile? Perhaps a cool vintage motorcycle? Maybe even a horse?

Are you an out of the can cranberry sauce aficionado (like 90% of Americans) or do you like the REAL thing? (I think I may have revealed where I stand on this issue.)

Cell phone conversations on planes? Yea or Nay?

The Twitter Emitter

@JC_Christian Zimmerman's lead in the 2016 GOP primary is looking insurmountable after the latest news.

— steve buie (@misterhaircutt) November 21, 2013

"I believe in forgiveness and redemption," says Trey Radel. "Unless you need welfare. Then I also require a drug test." #GOP #DoubleStandard

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 21, 2013

These Judges are BENGHAZI SOCIALIZED GAY MEDICINE !

— rootless (@root_e) November 21, 2013

Senate's going nuclear? Shit. I hadn't stocked up on canned goods and @treyradel says he's out of coke!

— Young GOP Gums (@YoungGOPGums) November 21, 2013

Republicans suggest a compromise: Eliminate filibuster for judicial nominees, but only when GOP in power.

— Sr. WH Official (@SrWHOfficial) November 21, 2013

Gonna be great when DC circuit rules Reid's attempt to change rules to put judges on DC circuit unconstitutional.

— NickBaumann (@NickBaumann) November 21, 2013

"Harry Reid isn't being fair!" - The Party That #Shutdown The Fucking Government #NuclearOption #GOP #p2

— Eric Wolfson (@ericwolfson) November 21, 2013

I wanted single payer filibuster reform.

— David Waldman (@KagroX) November 21, 2013

I think we should have saved "the nuclear option" to describe people being able to make cell phone calls on planes.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 21, 2013

I would be cool with the Senate buying some cocaine tonight.

— David Waldman (@KagroX) November 21, 2013

Filibuster change with 52 votes = tyranny. Also, Obacare with 60 votes = tyranny. M-O-O-N, that spells tyranny!

— David Waldman (@KagroX) November 22, 2013

By the time my train pulls into DC, the woman behind me will have achieved the rare feat of having no unexpressed opinions.

— Olivier Knox (@OKnox) November 21, 2013

Interrogatories

It’s False Confession Day! Tell us something really good that you didn’t really do.

You can tell we’re in the lead up to Thanksgiving. What kind of stuffing do you like? Do you prefer it cooked in or outside of the bird?

Do you smoke? If not, did you ever? How hard was it to quit? (this could be a repeat question)

It is also Use Less Stuff Day. If you combine the first two words, you get Useless Stuff Day. Do you have any Useless Stuff to get rid of? What’s keeping you?

Bonus question stolen from Chris Hayes’ show last night: If you were President, who would you give the Presidential Medal of Freedom to?

The Twitter Emitter

The only groups that want to repeal Obamacare are whites and Republicans, or — as the GOP calls them — everyone. http://t.co/ro8lORGbzg

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 20, 2013

When Trey Raydel drops his rap album I hope he calls himself MC White Privilege.

— Shugah (@Shugah) November 20, 2013

Pssst, America? You're actually allowed to do Small Business Saturday on Black Friday.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 20, 2013

Obamacare is Stalin's Waterloo. (did I get that right?)

— Frank Vdl (@fvdlfvdl) November 20, 2013

Paul Ryan: "My proposal will end poverty by eliminating food stamps and Medicaid so the poor will start businesses with money from parents."

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 20, 2013

what do you call a sleep walking nun? a roamin' Catholic.

— Shayera Tangri (@shayera) November 21, 2013

No cats received a Presidential Medal of Freedom today. A travesty.

— The Fucking Cat (@TheFuckingCat) November 21, 2013

I can't be partisan, I have a Republican friend. #Proof #UniteBlue

— GOPathetic (@GOPathetic) November 21, 2013

Rep. Trey Radel isn't a hypocrite for voting to make food stamp recipients take drug tests– he was high and didn't know what he was doing.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 21, 2013

Interrogatories

Who or what do you nominate for most absurd for today’s National Absurdity Day?

Have you named your PC (or Mac or whatever you have)? What is it? Have you named any other devices or household appliances?

Have you named your car? (I thought of a really personal one I could ask the guys, but I politely refrained.)

What company do you use for your phone? Cable? How awful are they?

Have you ever had an out of body experience?

The Twitter Emitter

George Zimmerman just learned that assaulting someone who's not black can get you arrested, like, right away.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 18, 2013

Not saying the market for #Bitcoin has peaked, but Manti Te'o sold all his this afternoon

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 19, 2013

Gettysburg Address is just the same old partisan slavemaster blaming from the 1860 campaign. Lincoln needs to reach across the aisle.

— Matt Yglesias (@mattyglesias) November 19, 2013

@CRobertBuchanan @KagroX Come on guys, lay off Walmart. They open at 6 on Thanksgiving, so it's not like their employees get to eat anyway.

— Spencer Windes (@spencerwindes) November 19, 2013

Was going to have a beer but I was afraid of becoming an alcoholic so I did a pound of cocaine instead.

— TBogg (@tbogg) November 19, 2013

My Dad isn't "testing" you, He's fucking with you. There's a difference.

— Jesus Christ (@Jesus_M_Christ) November 19, 2013

I am looking forward to 6pm Thanksgiving Day when Walmart opens its doors for its annual sale of trampled human corpses.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) November 19, 2013

I have a feeling the GOP may regret that the only minority they did any outreach to in 2013 was George Zimmerman.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 20, 2013

George Zimmerman: "I no longer feel safe around women now the judge has taken my guns away."

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 20, 2013

Interrogatories

What, if anything, would you like to be Supreme Commander of?

Do you have any desire to go into space?

Do you own any original artwork? What kind?

Did you ever give or receive an animal as a gift?

Did you hitchhike?

The Twitter Emitter

#ThatAwkwardMoment when Walton family wealth tops $100B and Walmart starts asking for donations to feed its employees http://t.co/HPDDE5Wjde

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 19, 2013

Liz Cheney campaign announces she and her sister "going on a hunting trip to patch up their differences."

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 19, 2013

Kickstarter to fire the Geico advertisement team into space

— Chris Jackson (@ChrisCJackson) November 17, 2013

Nice try with the fall colors, trees. If you want me to look at you, you better start displaying Twitter updates.

— Tim Siedell (@badbanana) November 17, 2013

Rush Limbaugh, who paid a married gay man millions to sing at his 4th wedding, is warning how gays will destroy marriage.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 17, 2013

Republicans want to "fix" ObamaCare the same way they fixed Iraq.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 15, 2013

Rafael Cruz, Sr: "Black voters are uninformed." Sarah Palin: "Yes, they don't even know the meaning of the word slavery." #GOP #insanity

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 14, 2013

Why can't Obama give answers in 140 characters or less for journalists who think using Twitter is reporting?

— TBogg (@tbogg) November 14, 2013

Being Gay is natural, hating Gay is a lifestyle choice.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 14, 2013

I'm not racist, but it's perfectly reasonable to assume that all White people are exactly like Rob Ford.

— William K. Wolfrum (@Wolfrum) November 14, 2013

Interrogatories

Was your first name used for a hurricane or tropical storm? Were you particularly devastating?

What were your favorite childhood toys?

Do you have a namesake? Anyone named after you?

Where is the weirdest place you ever fell asleep?

The Twitter Emitter

MSNBC figures Alec Baldwin show is a safe bet. If he ends up in jail, they can revert to "Lockup: Alec Baldwin."

— roadkillrefugee (@rkref) November 14, 2013

After a gas pipeline exploded in Milford, Rick Perry, per Texas law, sent a thank you note to the company for doing business in the state.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 15, 2013

The media continues to hold Obama to a far higher standard than they do the lying clowns of the GOP #inners

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) November 15, 2013

Michele Bachmann Frogmarched Before Obamacare Death Panels, Or 'Has To Buy Own Insurance,' Same Thing http://t.co/voc4ZU2e3L

— Wonkette (@Wonkette) November 15, 2013

Think I’m going to wear the same sweater I wore yesterday for Yellen solidarity.

— Lisa McIntire (@LisaMcIntire) November 15, 2013

Rob Ford: "God, I wish the media would forget about me for a day." Make A Wish Foundation: "You got it!"

— daveweigel (@daveweigel) November 15, 2013

In my opinion, constantly referring to things as Obama's Katrina is just taunting God to send us another Katrina.

— Will McAvoy (@WillMcAvoyACN) November 15, 2013

Our era has truly excelled in the field of mediocrity.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) November 15, 2013

So the new SONY PS4 online network is down. ALERT ISSA! DRUDGE SIREN!

— roadkillrefugee (@rkref) November 15, 2013

America. Where 1 middle class woman in Florida having to pick a new plan is a bigger deal than 5 million poor people being denied insurance.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) November 15, 2013

"Toronto Mayor 'To Lose Some Powers.'" Not the power to shock and amuse us, I hope.

— Ben Greenman (@bengreenman) November 15, 2013

He who hesitates is not only lost, but miles from the next exit.

— Yuppy (@TradingYuppy) November 16, 2013

Interrogatories

Have you ever actually attended any Olympics games?

Have you ever done rock or mountain climbing?

Have you ever done any cave exploring? Do you feel comfortable in underground situations?

What is your favorite library you’ve ever visited?

The Twitter Emitter

When saying no comes easily, it is often because you would rather shut down a good idea than allow anyone else to have one.

— Lizz Winstead (@lizzwinstead) November 13, 2013

From how everyone reacts to everything, I'm pretty sure we won't have near enough exclamation points when its the real end of the world.

— William K. Wolfrum (@Wolfrum) November 13, 2013

On this day in 1986, Ronald Reagan went on TV and said he did not trade weapons for hostages."But Obama said I could keep my plaaaaan!!"

— kara vallow (@teenagesleuth) November 14, 2013

Rob Ford is the Lance Armstrong of Canada

— Lizz Winstead (@lizzwinstead) November 14, 2013

Welsh Wheel of Fortune. "I'd like to buy a vowel." Well, we all would. Dream on, son.

— David Waldman (@KagroX) November 14, 2013

In fairness to Obama, making the Democratic Party break into cold-sweat panic is easier than the TV Guide crossword puzzle.

— daveweigel (@daveweigel) November 14, 2013

I can feel the Jesus in this tweet. RT @CatholicLeague: Don't fix it. Let it die.

— Jennifer Hayden (@Scout_Finch) November 14, 2013

"Obamacare hasn't cured cancer yet so we should kill it with fire" – everyone who was against it in the first place

— TBogg (@tbogg) November 14, 2013

If I had half a brain, I'd be overqualified for the White House press corps.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) November 14, 2013

It's Joseph McCarthy's birthday or, as Fox News calls it, "Founder's Day."

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) November 14, 2013

Interrogatories

What is your favorite museum? What makes it your favorite?

What are some of the best traveling museum exhibits you’ve seen?

What is your favorite cold cereal? How do you eat it? (Milk, sugar, out of the box?)

What is your favorite kind of pickle? Do you like other pickled veggies? have you ever made your own?

The Twitter Emitter

Dear Flat-Earthers: We'd like to take your picture. Move a little to the right… just a bit more… one more step…

— Barracks O'Bama (@P0TUS) November 14, 2013

I suppose publishers of wingnut home schooling textbooks save a lot of money by limiting US history to the years between 1865 and 1970.

— eclecticbrotha (@eclecticbrotha) November 14, 2013

Don't tell @SarahPalinUSA but I think Jesus might be a little bit too liberal for her too.

— DrLearnALot (@DrLearnALot) November 13, 2013

Stop calling them "mass killers." The preferred term is "extreme gun enthusiast."

— JerryThomas (@JerryThomas) November 13, 2013

I look forward to understanding @SarahPalinUSA's ideas once she grasps the rudimentary elements of the English language.

— Tom Wellborn (@TLW3) November 13, 2013

The commercialization of Christmas is wrong, except when Bill O'Reilly or Sarah Palin are making money off books about the War On Christmas.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) November 13, 2013

Fun fact: every time Cuccinelli ascended to higher office, he was replaced by a Democrat. #VotersRemorse

— roadkillrefugee (@rkref) November 13, 2013

Maybe they'll let the people who lose Medicaid insurance complain on TV or op-ed pages. JOKE! Because who wants to hear from poor people?

— Teresa Kopec (@TeresaKopec) November 13, 2013

Richard Cohen's next column is going to be about what he has learned about raising black kids by watching old Webster episodes

— TBogg (@tbogg) November 13, 2013

The only two safe growth industries left are Medical Cannabis and Tattoo removal.

— John Fugelsang (@JohnFugelsang) November 13, 2013