Happy Inauguration Day! I remember being in those crowds four years ago. Never before had I seen so many people crowded together and moving so slowly and STILL all in a fabulous mood. Every time the crowd had to stop moving for a moment, people would turn to whoever they were next to and ask, “So where are you from?” It was really fun, really amazing.
This year I get to watch from the comfort of my couch. Crowded with cats, clutching a cup of coffee. Hopefully not coughing. 😉
I will not let you off the hook on my nosy questions, however. Why would I do that?
For starters, what was your first car? Should there be nuts in brownies? What about frosting? If you were being inaugurated, whose bible (or what other book) would you want to be sworn in on? Do you like Michelle’s bangs? What did you keep in your high school locker? When you travel, do you travel light or heavy? What scene that you witnessed in your pre-every phone having a camera life do you wish you had been able to capture in a photo?
Last nights Twitter offerings are:
ME: “Do you have the cocktail menu?” BARTENDER: sigh “I don’t have time to make, like, 75 cocktails.” ME: “Well, I only need 74.”
— daveweigel (@daveweigel) January 20, 2013
You don’t go to hell for masturbating. In fact, you go to heaven, albeit only for a few seconds.
— God (@TheTweetOfGod) January 20, 2013
Reports that Biden added “in bed” to each sentence in the vice presidential oath are greatly exaggerated.
— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) January 20, 2013
The #RomneyInauguration isn’t some Twitter hashtag joke– it’s real, and taking place right now in Avignon.
— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) January 20, 2013
5 people got shot at gun shows yesterday, but on most days double that number of gun owners are shot, so Gun Appreciation Day was a success!
— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) January 20, 2013
Go ahead and cling to your guns, but they won’t help you stop the one percent from squashing your wages and stealing your future.
— Lalo Alcaraz (@laloalcaraz) January 20, 2013
The difference between Manti Te’o and the GOP is Republicans are sure their imaginary girlfriend exists. But she was kidnapped by ACORN.
— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) January 20, 2013
NRA Gun Safety Message #1: Try not to shoot yourself until AFTER you have purchased the weapon.
— Lalo Alcaraz (@laloalcaraz) January 20, 2013
Really sad that Patriots couldn’t win this one for their dead internet girlfriends.
— TBogg (@tbogg) January 21, 2013
Now, it’s time for your history lesson. Pay attention, and don’t forget to read the hovers.