Motley Moose – Archive

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

Interrogatories

When you go to sleep on the night before Christmas, are those visions of sugarplums dancing in your head, or something else? What?

Have you ever been discriminated against on the job by an employer?

It’s National Roots Day. Tell me about your roots. Are they in need of a touch up? Perhaps they are invasive and getting into the plumbing. Perhaps you are spending too much time on ancestry.com? Or maybe there is a team you are rooting for?

Did you ever, in your life, get addicted to a soap opera?

The Twitter Emitter

#YouMightBeARepublican if you wanted Bashir fired for offending Palin w/facts but Phil Robertson forgiven for insulting millions w/bigotry

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) December 20, 2013

The ten most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm Paul Ryan and I'm here to help the poors.'

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 20, 2013

Is it too ridiculous to pray that we’re close to the end of America’s redneck fetish?

— ¡socratic! (@socratic) December 20, 2013

George Zimmerman will have to shoot another black child if he wants to prevent #DuckDynasty guy from replacing him as GOP conv keynote #tcot

— Gen JC Xtian patriot (@JC_Christian) December 20, 2013

Phil Robertson recommends "12 Years A Slave" because sometimes you just want to see a movie where the folks onscreen are having fun.

— Bonnie McFarlane (@bonniemcfarlane) December 20, 2013

BREAKING: Standoff at Macy's as Ted Cruz is blocking checkout line and refusing to move until Obama agrees to repeal Obamacare.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) December 20, 2013

First they came for the 67-year old bearded Southerners with antiquated beliefs, and I said nothing, because zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

— daveweigel (@daveweigel) December 20, 2013

Target may be bad but lots of hacking at Walmart as well. It's the lung of the guy in front of me buying cigarettes and Vienna Sausages.

— CrutnackerNutcracker (@Crutnacker) December 20, 2013

I feel bad for Conservatives choosing sides between gay bashing and capitalism. Must be like picking a favorite child. #DuckDynasty

— DadNeedsADrink (@DadNeedsADrink) December 20, 2013

If it whines like a duck, bitches like a duck and is bigoted like a duck then it's a wingnut.

— kara vallow (@teenagesleuth) December 20, 2013

  Good morning Motley Meese! Hope your weekend was lovely. Snow again here. 3rd accumulating snow so far this year, more than we had all last winter.

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

Interrogatories

If we had to let one state secede, if only to show them how bad things would be for them, which state would you choose?

Do you ever go caroling? Do you get carolers where you live?

How many pairs of shoes do you own? Do you need any more?

If you could have back one attribute of your youth, what would it be?

The Twitter Emitter

Breaking: A shocked A&E suspends Duck Dynasty star for anti-Gay slurs. Also apologizes a guy died in the A&E reality show "Let's Kill a Guy"

— William K. Wolfrum (@Wolfrum) December 19, 2013

Peggy Noonan: "I'm giving framed columns where I compare the current president to Reagan for Christmas. Everyone got a different one!"

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) December 19, 2013

"They are arguing over what color Santa is. They are not ready." — Aliens watching us and deciding not to make First Contact

— pourmecoffee (@pourmecoffee) December 19, 2013

It seems like putting Alec Baldwin on Duck Dynasty for a weeks would be the fairest punishment for everyone.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 19, 2013

What I've learned today: Sarah Palin thinks the Constitution protects the right to have a reality TV franchise. I'm off to drink now.

— Chris Lehmann (@lehmannchris) December 19, 2013

Sarah Palin: "Criticizing Phil Robertson is intolerant. Free speech includes everything, people. Everything but insults against me."

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) December 20, 2013

You have a constitutionally-protected right to verbally express your complete misunderstanding of your constitutionally-protected rights.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) December 20, 2013

Good morning, Moosekind. TGIF! Hope it has been a good week for everyone.

Interrogatories

Are there any pets in your neighborhood that you wish would move out?

What is your greatest vice? Greatest virtue?

What category of book do you own the most of?

What smells, for you, mark each season?

The Twitter Emitter

There are people on “Duck Dynasty”? I thought it was like Meerkat Manor for mallards.

— Teresa Kopec (@TeresaKopec) December 19, 2013

I give America credit. Even complete idiots who have no clue what free speech even means have the right to speak freely.

— William K. Wolfrum (@Wolfrum) December 19, 2013

It Christians today just ranted about the rich, the religious hierarchy & divorcees as Jesus did, they wouldn't get or lose reality shows.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 19, 2013

Sad Duck Dynasty fans playing and rewinding Ned Beatty piggy scene in Deliverance in order to get their hillbilly fix. #NoPhilNoShow

— TBogg (@tbogg) December 19, 2013

I'm sick of you all violating my first amendment right to a reality show.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 19, 2013

Hating people is a lifestyle choice.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) December 19, 2013

Supporters of Duck Dynasty guy to wear camo tomorrow in solidarity which will make the lines at Walmart appear to be a lot shorter.

— TBogg (@tbogg) December 19, 2013

You would think by now people would understand that free speech doesn't mean freedom of consequences from the words you speak.

— Will McAvoy (@WillMcAvoyACN) December 19, 2013

I genuinely don't remember making you all this stupid.

— God (@TheTweetOfGod) December 19, 2013

  Make sure you let your peeps

  know where to find you!  

Interrogatories

Have you ever been to a performance of “Nutcracker,” or is it a yearly TV viewing experience for your family?

Do you ever bake cookies or other foods as gifts? What kinds?

What magazines did your family subscribe to when you were growing up? Which were your favorites, and why?

What is the most boring sport?

The Twitter Emitter

So cute to watch Republicans line up to tell Santa what they want in exchange for the debt ceiling.

— LOLGOP (@LOLGOP) December 17, 2013

By the way, Marxists don't believe in God, so unless you're arguing that the Pope is atheist, shut the fuck up morons.

— Chris Dashiell (@cdashiell) December 17, 2013

Paul Ryan suggest tying debt ceiling vote to Keystone XL: "Sometimes the politicians the Kochs own have to blackmail the ones they don't"

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) December 17, 2013

Maybe the Brazilians will be able to tell us what happened in Benghazi.

— kara vallow (@teenagesleuth) December 18, 2013

Mega Millions is $636 million, which sounds like a lot, though the Koch brothers would point out that it's not enough to buy an election.

— Top Conservative Cat (@TeaPartyCat) December 18, 2013

Egalitarianism isn't for everyone.

— Mr Roger Quimbly (@RogerQuimbly) December 16, 2013

REMINDER: The best way to help Sarah Palin take the commercialization out of Christmas is to not buy her book

— The Daily Edge (@TheDailyEdge) December 17, 2013

BREAKING: Shia LaBeouf hired as Sen. Rand Paul's head speech writer

— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) December 17, 2013

HBO inks deal w/Peter Jackson to turn "The Old Man and the Sea" into a 12-part miniseries. To include an octopus, pirates, & a whirlpool.

— Alex Parker (@AlexParkerDC) December 17, 2013

SOYLENT GREEN IS HUMAN RESOURCES

— Amy Phillips Bursch (@APBBlue) December 17, 2013

Pat Buchanan's a self-identified "paleoconservative", but is he thinking dinosaur or trilobite? Trilobites think dinosaurs are Marxist.

— William Gibson (@GreatDismal) December 17, 2013