I fear I have been naive, for I have thought that the behaviors of our Congress (specifically, the Republicans therein) had hit rock bottom, that the limit of asshattery has been reached. Not so! Today’s Senate shenanigans over Chuck Hagel’s nomination may have been the straw that broke this weary old camel’s back. Seeking relief in humor, I have compiled a brief list of unflattering remarks about our legislative branch by famous people. Please add as you see fit.
Note: I don’t have strong feelings about Hagel one way or the other. I do have strong feelings about dysfunctionality.
Congress seems drugged and inert most of the time. Even when the problems it ignores build up to crises and erupt in strikes, riots, and demonstrations, it has not moved. Its idea of meeting a problem is to hold hearings or, in extreme cases, to appoint a commission. ~ Shirley Chisholm
Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listens-and then everybody disagrees. ~ Boris Marshalov
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. ~ Will Rogers
In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress. ~ John Adams, second US president
We may not imagine how our lives could be more frustrating and complex-but Congress can. ~ Cullen Hightower
Congress consists of one third, more or less, scoundrels; two thirds, more or less, idiots; and three thirds, more or less, poltroons. ~ H. L. Mencken
Politics is the entertainment branch of industry. ~ Frank Zappa
From Charlie Wilson’s War
Joanne Herring: “Why is Congress saying one thing and doing nothing?”
Charlie Wilson: “Well, tradition mostly.”
From Mark Twain Tonight!
I was very particular about the kind of job I wanted. I didn’t want to work. So I went over to the Congress, that Grand Old Benevolent National Asylum for the Helpless, and I reported on the inmates there.
A jay hasn’t got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray; and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise. ~ Mark Twain
It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress. ~ Mark Twain