Motley Moose – Archive

Since 2008 – Progress Through Politics

When Barriers Fall

The barriers erected by  prejudice always amaze me, after they are gone. I have fought for women’s rights, for civil rights for blacks and for gay rights. But it is the latter which has claimed my greatest outrage. I think it is because I have been more seriously threatened as a gay person-as a lesbian.

In Manhattan, 2 cops called me faggot,  forced  me into an alley and pushed me around. I think they wanted to hurt me real bad. My friends intervened by refusing to leave the entrance to the alley so the cops no longer had the privacy to wreak their vengeance.  

In Montana, my car was soaped with the word faggot. This was not long before a known gay woman disappeared-she’s never been found-in a nearby township.

In Ithaca New York, I was evicted from my apartment for being gay. How did they know? The town newspaper identified me as “Cornell’s first out lesbian professor.”

In a Manhattan pizza parlor  a crazy street guy  repeatedly stabbed me with his cane shouting, “You the boy or the girl? Huh? Huh? Two gay guys who were passing by saw it through the window and helped me out.

I have been called names, spit on, left out and disliked because I am gay. But I have not been thrown out of the military. Why? I would never have been so foolish as to enlist. Why go where you aren’t wanted? We have enough trouble, don’t we? We can stand raids on our bars by cops, we can brave anti-gay immigration laws, we can see our heroes gunned down, and we can still hold hands with pride. But why go asking for trouble? If you are gay it finds you soon enough. The reality of Hate crimes against gays may still be debated in the straight world, but we know the truth.

That’s why whenever I hear the argument advanced that gays aren’t Really discriminated against, a part of me laughs. Inside that is– down in a secret place. It is here that I harbor a meme that believes all straights want to kill all gays. I don’t mean this literally. But I do mean it figuratively. Straight people are the enemy. And it doesn’t matter how well meaning they appear or how evenhanded they seem. My little gay self knows that straights cannot be trusted.

Everyone is so worried about whether or not gays can be trusted. For me, it is the other way around. I’ve had friends who turned their back as soon as they “knew.” My Master thesis adviser told me to excise the gay “stuff” from my dissertation. Somehow she didn’t understand that when the client asked if I was gay, and I said yes, I forged a bond so strong that my client was able to overcome her agoraphobia.

There’s much more to say. But a part of me is less than transported by all the straight military types who now support gays in their ranks. Yes, I know another milestone! Comparable to when the APA said homosexuality is not a mental illness. Fist pump. Yahoo. But they always knew it, didn’t they? It’s all politics. Recruitment is down. An all volunteer military needs all the able bodies it can get.  


48 comments

  1. Sure, call me a cheerleader, but it’s stories like yours that give me hope.  At 44 I have some recollection of when being gay was more a risk than it is today, but it is the period just before I became aware of such things that was the end of the worst: largely because people like you were taking the risk to be “the first openly gay”.  Gay rights is in fact the lagging human rights issue – infinitely more progress has been made in the realm of social progress along racial lines – but it’s not what it was.

    Thanks for reminding us where we are coming from and where we need to go to.  Keep the pressure up and the rest of us will try to add a shoulder to the wheel.

  2. However, I didn’t lead your life, I led mine – that of a hetero white male. I am apparently one of the enemy. But that, of course, isn’t true. If it was true then gays would be at war with straights. That’s a war that gays can’t win.

    Gays aren’t at war with straights, they are at war with bigotry and hatred based on sexual orientation. That is the war that must be won and you will need all of the allies you can get in that war, however tepid the support from some of them.

  3. linfar

    I have not been articulating my reservation about this whole DADT deal very well. Why are we getting rid of DADT now? I am not sure. We desperately need bodies to fight our wars of intervention. Recruitment is a staggeringly difficult issue with an all volunteer army. Hey, let the gays in–that’ll help. And gays will rejoice and jump up and down. Progress!! I am hung up on the part of this that is so callous and calculating. But maybe all progress with civil rights has this aspect. Why DID Lincoln free the slaves? Because it was the right thing to do. Nah! He did it to help the North in the Civil War!!

    a few seconds ago ยท  

  4. linfar

    Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass.), who is openly gay, this week pressured the administration to make sure that gays and lesbians can serve openly as soon as possible. He criticized the Pentagon’s year-long review of the policy, saying that it could push off congressional action on “Don’t ask, don’t tell.”

    “As quickly as we can do this it will be toward the end of the year,” Frank said in a raised voice. “So Gates has plenty of time to study whatever the hell he wants to study.”

  5. HappyinVT

    …Over the next 90 days our campaign is focusing on lawmakers who sit on the Senate Armed Services Committee, and the entire Senate. We need more energy and action there. Thursday, Feb. 11 is a multi-hour DADT hearing in the Senate Armed Services Committee. This will be the perfect opportunity for DADT advocates to be a part of the fight. They should call both of their U.S. senators before Thursday, ask where each stands on repeal and tell them to end “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” this year. SLDN will be coordinating a grassroots campaign to inundate Senate offices next week with phone calls urging senators to get repeal done in 2010.

    Congress must repeal DADT this year while the Department of Defense conducts its study. Both can and should happen concurrently. DoD’s study Working Group should not hold up legislative repeal, since the study Working Group is not looking at if the law should be repealed but how. “The question before us is not whether the military prepares to make this change, but how we best prepare for it,” Sec. Gates told the committee earlier this week. And Sen. Mark Udall (D-CO) wrote, “A study should not unduly delay taking our last steps toward final action.”

    http://www.sldn.org/blog/archi

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