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Since 2008 – Progress Through Politics

Glenn Beck's InsaniTea

Welcome to Tax Day, ladies and gentleman!

I hope everyone’s gotten their taxes finished. My identity was recently stolen (why on earth would anybody wanna be me?), so there are a few extra hoops for me to leap through this year. But that’s nothing compared to the trials and tribulations suffered by your average taxpayer under the Obama administration. With injustices raining down upon the American public from every angle, the boldest amongst us are taking to the streets. Today, all around the country, thanks to the organizational efforts of the ever fair, ever balanced folks at Fox News Channel, whiny Republicans who can’t get over having their asses handed to them last November oppressed citizens will be coming together at “FNC Tax Day Tea Parties” to protest President Obama’s outrageous fiscal policies.

[Note: This diary was written in the buff.]

These hapless brave citizens are emulating our tea-tossing forefathers. Well. In a manner of speaking. Actually they’ve just been mailing little prepackaged tea bags to members of Congress. (That’s right, they’re TEABAGGING our politicians.) Today they’ll be gathering across the nation at “Tea Party” events hosted (and covered almost exclusively by) Fixed News, where outraged conservatives will rail against the injustices perpetrated by the Obama administration.

And what, precisely, are their grievances?

First, we have to contend with the largest tax cut in American history. That blasted tax and spend liberal has gone and CUT the taxes of everyone making less than $250,000. Teh horr0rz! Second, the wealthy aren’t even being left out here — he’s raising their taxes, and now they’re stuck paying a rate that’s 10 points lower than it was under St. Ronnie back in the 80’s! That’s right, dammit. Under St. Ronnie, the wealthy paid 50%. Now this socialist bastard (he’s dark too, by the way, did I mention that?) comes into office and only allows rich people to fork over a measly 40%.

It’s fitting that Faux has claimed the Parties as their own, since it is their “broadcasters” who have promoted them so joyously — and none moreso than their own rising star, Glenn Beck. Pick a topic, Beck’s got an opinion (or three). From crying over Sarah Palin (“one hot grandma”) to calling Hurricane Katrina victims “scumbags” to suggesting that Hillary Clinton is the antichrist to threatening to personally “choke the life out” of Michael Moore, Glenn Beck has covered it all.

Not only that, but Beck has put together a couple of lists for our benefit, comprised of nine principles and twelve values in which all good non-socialist, non-terrorist Americans need to believe.

The Nine Principles

1. America is good.

2.  I believe in God and He is the Center of my Life.

3. I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.

4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.

5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.  

6. I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.

7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.

8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.

9. The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.

The Twelve Values

1. Honesty

2. Reverence

3. Hope  

4. Thrift

5. Humility

6. Charity

7. Sincerity

8. Moderation

9. Hard Work

10. Courage

11. Personal Responsibility

12. Gratitude

Beck posits that by adhering to these 9 principles and 12 values we can return to the way we were on… wait for it… 9/12. “What does that mean?” you ask?  Well, I’ll let Mr. Colbert explain it to you.

The Colbert Report Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
The 10.31 Project
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor NASA Name Contest

Now, loyal viewers of Beck have been meeting together already. Per the braintrust gathered at a recent 9/12 Tea Party, we learn we need to ban the brainwashing TV boxes and burn the brainwashing books (especially the ones with evolution and stuff in ’em). To lure these fine, upstanding, God-fearing, America-loving folks into lapping up what he spews forth, Beck uses a few well-worn tools of manipulation. First and foremost: Fear. He scares the bejesus out of these poor folks by regaling them with tales of lost liberties, revolution, despair, and the complete and utter destruction of Faith, Family and Freedom. He also uses the favorite go-to emotional trick of every televangelist — the fake tears. “Oh, look at how sincere I am, look at my honest emotion! I must be a really good, genuine kinda guy, listen to me!” Top these parlor tricks off with a healthy (unhealthy) dose of conspiracy theorism that would make a 9/11 Truther blush, and you have the general make-up of his show.

It is so over the top that even his fellow Fox broadcasters mock him.

He has also earned the derision of Michelle Malkin’s Hot Air:

“Even before watching this, if you’d asked me which media star’s most likely to turn survivalist, move to the mountains, and start doing his show from a lead-lined bunker, there’s no doubt what the answer would have been. There’s something “off” about Beck in a way that’s not true of other chat-show hosts…”

– Allahpundit of Hot Air

Beck has even garnered criticism from everyone’s favorite rightwing blogfest, LittleGreenFootballs:

“Is it irresponsible for Fox News to be airing this over the top, creepy alarmist stuff during a financial crisis? Well, yeah, I think so. But then, I’ve pretty much stopped watching since it became the network of Mike Huckabee, Pat Buchanan, and all Hannity, all the time.”

LGF user

“Wow. Racists, 9/11 truthers, and conspiracy theorists, all brought to you by Fox News.”

LGF user

Even the folks over at MSNBC’s Morning Joe could not quite believe their eyes.

Here is but a sampling of the insanecrazystupidlunacy that springs forth from this fool:

Top 15 List of Lunacy

1. America is on the path to Socialism — or wait… is it Communism?!?

2. Oops, no, America is on the path to Fascism! (Yes, those are Nazis marching behind Beck’s lardass. I know it’s hard to see past his bulk.)

3. Gore is forming Hitler Youth. (Yeah, that’s right. You heard it here: Gore, the Goebbels of Global Warming.)

4. The Obama Administration is moving towards a global currency. (Starring Michelle Bachmann: Wherein Bachmann tries to outcrazy Beck… it’s a toss-up.)

5. Obama’s gonna take our guns away! (BECK: “Because he will slowly but surely take away your gun or take away your ability to shoot a gun, carry a gun. He will make them more expensive; he’ll tax them out of existence. He will because he has said he would. He will tax your gun or take your gun away one way or another.”)

6. Foreign nationals “have been dropped into position” to penetrate us and foment revolution! (Ought go over well with the Teabagging crowd…)

7. Harold Koh, Obama’s appointment to be Legal Advisor to the DoS, will allow international law to overrule U.S. law. (Perhaps even… **dramatic pause** Islamic sharia!)

8. FEMA is building concentration camps. (He later “debunked” the idea. Thanks, Glenn, for your determination to discover the truth of the matter. Thank you for not loudly hypothesizing on their existence before bothering to investigate. Stellar journalism, sir. I see you are BOUND to the Truth — your integrity is impeccable and laudable. Well played, well played indeed.)

9. Obama’s use of a teleprompter prompts Beck to label him the Manchurian Candidate. (…And to wonder who, exactly, “is writing every word for this man?”)

10. Hillary is the Anti-Christ, o noes!!!one!!!ELEVEN!!! (And OMG, the Satanic “stereotypical bitch” was almost our next president! Worse than socializm, iz Armageddonzzz!!!!!)

11. Stem Cell Research = Eugenics = Master Race = NAZIS!!! (Just read the article. The jokes make themselves.)

12. Polar bears deserve extinction because they eat people. (BECK: “They eat people! For the love of Pete, they’re big, angry bears. They eat people. Not that I say we go out and kill all of them, but I mean, it doesn’t seem to be a problem here.”)

13. Obama was the first president sworn in without a Bible. (Presumably because our new Muslim socialist dictator removed all of the Bibles from the White House…?)

14. Americorps will indoctrinate your children. (This Obama program will brainwash your child via community service… and we all know how detrimental to one’s health community service is.)

15. America is destined for Depression and Revolution under Obama. (BECK: “Let’s just play all the cards out on the table. I’m full fledged crazy nuts — you know it and I know it. So here it is… this is what’s comin’ America: Depression and Revolution. That’s what’s coming.”)

Well, we can easily see that this man is a nutter, but is he dangerous as well? Whether or not HE actually believes what he is putting out there, the fact is that many watching his show DO believe it. Most will not act out in ways that cause harm, but there is a percentage, however small, of extremists whose hatreds and paranoias are stoked by such fuel.  While most who see his antics, even those from his own “side”, roll their eyes and laugh, there are those who swallow it hook, line, and sinker. And of those, there are some who will act out in fear and hatred, having been stirred to action by his espousing that which they fear the most. As Eric Boehlert pointed out,

I wonder if Glenn Beck knows who Jim Adkisson is. Adkisson made headlines on July 28, 2008, when he brought his sawed-off 12-gauge shotgun into the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church in Knoxville, Tennessee, and, after whipping it out of a guitar case, opened fire on parishioners while a group of schoolchildren performed songs up by the altar. Adkisson killed two people and wounded several others.

Adkisson, a 58-year-old unemployed truck driver, brought 70 shotgun shells with him to the church and assumed he’d keep killing until the police arrived on the scene and shot him dead as well. Instead, some members of the congregation were able to wrestle him to the ground and hold him for police.

When investigators went to Adkisson’s home in search of a motive, as well as evi
dence for the pending trial, they found copies of Savage’s Liberalism is a Mental Disorder, Let Freedom Ring by Sean Hannity, and The O’Reilly Factor, by Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly. They also came across what was supposed to have been Adkisson’s suicide note: a handwritten, four-page manifesto explaining his murderous actions. The one-word answer for his deed? Hate. The three-word answer? He hated liberals.

The only way we can rid ourselves of this evil is kill them in the streets. Kill them where they gather. I’d like to encourage other like minded people to do what I’ve done. If life aint worth living anymore don’t just Kill yourself. Do something for your Country before you go. Go Kill Liberals!

What Adkisson especially hated about liberals (“this cancer, this pestilence”) and what he hated about candidate “Osama Hussein Obama” was that they were marching America toward ruin: “Liberals are evil, they embrace the tenets of Karl Marx, they’re Marxist, socialist, communists.” Adkisson seethed over the way liberals were “trying to turn this country into a communist state” and couldn’t comprehend why they would “embrace Marxism.”

Sound familiar, Glenn?

John Bohstedt was one of the Unitarian church members who tackled Adkisson after the first round of gunfire went off inside the sanctuary. Two months ago, Adkisson pleaded guilty to the murder charges and was sentenced to life in prison. At the hearing, Bohstedt told the Associated Press he didn’t think the killer had been insane, but rather had been manipulated by anti-liberal rhetoric.

“There are a lot of people who hate liberals, and if we stir that around in the pot and on the airwaves, eventually there will be people (like Adkisson) … who get infected by the violent rhetoric and put it into violent action,” Bohstedt said.

He remained worried about future violence: “Do you think there are other Jim Adkissons out there listening to hate speech? I do.”

Fox may have found their Golden Goose with Glenn Beck. He has brought ratings and national attention to the rightwing “news source” when it looked as though they might be headed into obscurity following the election of Barack Obama. However, with the ratings comes the risk of fomenting an underlying current of hatred and fear that may well spark unintended results. The Department of Homeland Security just released a report declaring “Rightwing Extremism the most dangerous domestic terrorism threat in the United States.” Somehow, this does not surprise me. Let’s hope that Mr. Beck tones down his fearmongering a notch (or 8), and that logic prevails.

So, there you go. Your introduction to Glenn Beck. I hope you were both amused and horrified by what passes as “news commentary” over on Faux these days. Makes Hannity and O’Reilly seem tame. For more on Beck, check out his Dickipedia page. Also, this article from The Daily Beast does a good job summing up why Beck ought not be on the air (though, I don’t think Limbaugh ought be either). Lastly, for anyone who takes this man seriously, here is a much needed accessory.



  1. ..not the mad republican bit, but the tiny note you were writing this in the buff. It’s… hard… to… concentrate…

    I’ll be back to comment on the buffoonery of the right after a cold shower.  

  2. GrassrootsOrganizer

    I’ve been watching this morning’s coverage of Teabagging Day on CNN. From the best I can tell it’s going to be damn hard to hire a clown for a children’s party or get any Amway deliveries today.  And if I need to buy firewood out of the back of a pickup truck I think I’m shit out of luck.

    I don’t know about ya’ll, but I’m concerned about the economy grinding to a halt on Teabagging Day.  What if I need ammo?  Will the gun shops even open today?  

  3. with professional wrestling. Most people know it’s fake, but there are always a few that take it seriously. Hopefully, there aren’t very many of them. About all they surround is the Parcheesi table in the nut house common room.  

  4. Is truly scary.  Truly.

    I’ve seen most of what’s in the diary along the way somewhere on the Internets, but seeing it all in one place is something to behold.  A few (random) thoughts:

    4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.

    Yes.  So quit forbidding the existence of loving gay families.

    9.It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.

    Is that why I got spit on when I was wearing an Obama shirt last year?  And called a traitor in 2003 when I suggested that perhaps we finish a fight in Afghanistan and not invade a new country?

    I am always open to new ideas, but I can not abide a hypocrite of any stripe, from any political party.  90% of the teabaggers today are hypocrites.  They are, as Jon Stewart said, confusing tyranny with losing.  

    Let them protest, though, if it makes them feel better.  Let them work to vote out the Republicans that allowed the last president to run up a huge tab, if they are serious.  

  5. where do you guys get these people.  just a quick look reveals that this guy is milking his punditry version of dancing with the stars moment.  why we – or anyone else pays attention to these goons is unreal.

    i mean seriously – do you guys know people that think this buffoonery is good shit?

  6. …of Beck the other night. He kept playing a sequence where Beck was in (faux) tears because “I love this country so much”.

    Beck even has the temerity to criticise the families of 9/1 victims, and then start his 9/12 project to recreate in people the feelings they had the day after 9/11.

    Watching him talk recreates similiar emotions in me: shock, horror, disgust. But adds another – pure hilarity.

    This guy has got to be a joke. But then again, I thought the same of Palin.

    (PS. What is in that T-Bag at the bottom. I hope it’s a pessary and Beck can put it where the sun doesn’t shine)  

  7. fogiv

    [Note: This diary was written in the buff.]

    I read it in that condition as well, teabagging my chair all the while.  I’m a true patriot after all.

    Why is it that guys like Don Imus get fired for the shit they say (not defending it), but fuckheads like Rush and Glenn Beck spew dangerously crazy bullshit day in and day out?  I mean, if we can use public pressure to banish someone from the public pulpit for being callous and/or insensitive why can’t we do the same for people who are violence inducing, batshit insane liars?

  8. Kysen

    A diary chock full of Teabagging.

    On the Moose.

    Who’da thunk it?  😉

    That man is full on off his swede. It is horrifying that anyone tunes in to him…let alone in the numbers that he pulls. FWIW…I’ve been off and MSNBC all day and I have seen nary a mention of the asshats gathered for their Mad Tea Party. (holy shit, kid you noot the MOMENT I typed this…Chuck Todd mentioned them…da bastid) (I like Chuck T..just wish he hadn’t given these cuntymints the time of day). Ah well.


    I read it in that condition as well, teabagging my chair all the while.  I’m a true patriot after all.

    You too!? I figured a diary written in the buff ought be read in the buff (seems only fitting). I wonder how many other proud patriots we have here at teh Moose?

    (PS. What is in that T-Bag at the bottom. I hope it’s a pessary and Beck can put it where the sun doesn’t shine)

    if it’s a pessary…I hope it’s filled with poison ivy. Would like to see that rotten bastard squirm (painfully) in his seat.

    I really hope he remains firmly in the ‘Fool’ category….and is never proven to be a ‘Dangerous Fool’.

    (and good question Fog, why did Imus get fired and this Genital Wart not get excised? Perhaps because MSNBC has some integrity….not expecting FOX to slip up and prove to have any anytime soon.)

  9. is trying to reconstitute Monty Python. However, given the state of the world now he has decided to do it as a straight documentary company focused on the Right wing. As he put it, “Why waste time writing comedy when it is ready made for you. You can’t make this shit up.”

  10. Jjc2008

    Needed some levity as I live in a conservative mecca, in the shadow of Focus on the Family, in the Congressional District the democrats pretty much have given up on.

    Sadly the “teabagging” nutzos are out in force here.  We have our version of Grover Nordquist, the fellow that got TABOR passed here and pretty much screwed much of the state’s ability to fix schools, roads, etc…..

    Over 2000 showed up for teabagging here. I was going to go down and ogle at their stupidity but our city allows concealed weapons and I suspect a lot of these nuts are armed.  

    I needed to find humor in this………because our city is scary when it comes to right wingers and gun toting libertarians.

  11. jonlester

    My fault for not planning ahead. Anyway, about 75-100 all-white faces in all at the Athens, Georgia event, counting late arrivals as I was leaving downtown. Nothing especially imaginative or outrageous in the signs. I heard one guy say something like our children are enslaved by debt or some such.  

  12. alyssa chaos

    they actually let a loon like Glenn Beck host his show at the Alamo.  

    I just hope the craziness isn’t contagious.

  13. HappyinVT

    These people are stupid.  Reading the signs (the coherent ones, anyway) just makes me shake my head.  They don’t know what they are protesting; they are just parroting what they heard on Fox “News.”  It almost makes me long for the days when I was stupid, too, although my level of stupid never rose to such glorious heights.

    I also don’t know if Beck believes all the crap he’s been spewing or he’s doing it for ratings, or both.  Anyone who took him seriously after that abysmal “crying” crap needs to have their head examined now.  And what happened to Lou Dobbs.  I actually looked forward to watching him when he hosted Moneyline back in the day.  Now, he’s gone almost completely off the rails, too.


    Most of this protest seems pretty harmless to me: a bunch of ignorant folks decrying the nation’s slide into communism/fascism/socialism/every other -ism that they don’t know the meaning of.  They don’t want to have their taxes increased (HOW MANY TIMES DOES OBAMA HAVE TO SAY THEY ARE TAX CUTS!  CUTS! YOU FREAKIN’ MORONS!)  Granted the extra money in my paycheck won’t buy me a mansion but I’ll take everything I can get.  (Don’t want to have to clean the mansion, anyway.)

    But then you have the truly bizarre stuff:

    Ayn Rand lives and this is just offensive and is indicative of the hyperbole that exists on the fringes of both sides.

    What scares me is that, while most of these people are content to go to the odd protest rally and carry oddly-worded signs, there are those whose anger is being stoked ad nauseum and that it will take someone (else) getting killed before Fox and Limbaugh, etc. are held accountable for the crap they put forth.

    (I’ll pause now so the NSA can target me.)

    If anything happens to the First Family, including the dog, everyone at Fox, Limbaugh, Malkin, Bachmann, et al better be carrying.

    But, most of today has been pretty funny.

  14. creamer

    for theese whako’s. They have always been in the republican orbit, but now republican leaders( I know, oxymoron) are courting them. Theese people have gun’s and think Jesus was a white man.

  15. Neef

    Beck smackdown, sricki. All the kudos have been given, I don’t know what to add – except to note that this guy’s ratings are phenomenal.

    Which, to me, is the scariest part.

  16. They are beginning to say that the tea parties are the reason Obama gave a talk about eliminating waste and cutting fat in govt. They are encouraging each other to keep up the pressure. They don’t seem to know that Obama has been pushing that message all along.  

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